Lisa Q. Mathews

Cheers, It’s Virtual Almost-St.-Paddy’s-Day!

Lisa here, with my annual St. Patrick’s Day post–’tis all life as usual, right? I had planned to fly straight from Left Coast Crime in San Diego to celebrate with my sister in Florida, where she is renting a house near the beach for a month. Things didn’t quite turn out, though, so here I am, lifting a cup of cold, badly-brewed coffee to you from a very sober New England. Hey, we could all use a little levity right now. So here’s to you and here’s to me–let’s get this party started!

Whenever I mention that my very favorite holiday falls on March seventeenth, I get puzzled looks. Why not Christmas? Thanksgiving? Fourth of July? Then the light dawns on the doubters: Ohhhh. It’s the green beer, right?

green.beer.fallon

(via Giphy)

Nope. I am most definitely not a fan of that slimy stuff. Why ruin a perfectly good pint of Harp? Don’t even get me started on green bagels. And Jaysus Mary and Joseph, what are THESE? (Ah, stop yer wingein’–down the hatch!):


I took this pic of my pup Farley when he was just three months old. He is still cute, though not quite as small and fuzzy now. And he’s still the same degree of thrilled about the green bandanna deal. I told him too bad, he is required to wear it, because he is an Irish pet. Every. Single. Year. Sorry, Farley.

Farley.

This is Lucy. I take this same picture of her every year, because she loves shamrocks and is always willing to pose. Or, at least she doesn’t strenuously object.

What to wear for Paddy’s Day? Well, this year, I guess it will be green jammies. In previous years (and hopefully next year), it’s imperative to hit your local Party Hearty store the day after Valentine’s Day to grab all that cool Irish-themed merchandise before it’s sold out. (Lads, you can leave those Kiss-Me-I’m-Irish buttons at home. Ditto the charming lines about what comes between you and your kilts. We get it.)

And ladies, it’s totally necessary to drag every bright green item of clothing you own out of your closet. Chances are, they will all be somewhere in the back, or buried under everything else, because the last time you saw them was last St. Patrick’s Day. It’s okay that you held onto them, though, because as Marie Kondo demands, they Inspire Joy.

Tina.Fey (5)

(via Giphy)

If closet diving is just too much of a chore, or completely hopeless—wait, did you give that glittery plastic top hat to the Goodwill?—then no worries. You can always grab that cute sleep tee you wore for the past three nights as a Paddy’s Day warm up.

gilmore

(via Giphy)

Now that you are properly attired, with nowhere to go and all pubs and parades canceled, you can at least  eat a decent Irish breakfast (yes, the blood sausage too–it’s good for you). Our great Chicks friend Keenan Powell is an expert on this. And you can give your spirits a boost and set the mood by downloading all those musical classics as you check out the latest breaking global news:  Whiskey in the Jar? Molly Malone? Danny Boy? The Pogues? And in the privacy of your home, you can show off those championship Irish dance skills. A regular Michael Flatley, y’are!

darby.o.gill

(via Giphy)

Just for fun, here’s a pic of me with the super-tall guy who leads the police bagpipe band in the Manchester Irish parade. He poses with people every year, if you ask very nicely. Or buy him a Guinness.

Parade.guy.Paddys

Remember, there’s no crying on Saint Paddy’s Day. No fuss, no stress (except maybe that closet hunting deal), and no need to cook other than that breakfast I mentioned, unless you simply must boil up your own corned beef and cabbage. Not one of my faves, I have to admit. Probably the only things left at the grocery store right now, lol.

So here’s to St. Patrick. May he drive the snakes from everywhere on the planet and sic ’em on the coronavirus. Slainte!

Paddys.Bfast

Readers, what will YOU be doing on St. Patrick’s Day? Or…what do you wish you could do?

 

36 thoughts on “Cheers, It’s Virtual Almost-St.-Paddy’s-Day!

  1. Great article. We all need to smile at “green jammies” and snicker at the different photos on your post! I only have a wee bit of Irish in me blood so I guess I will be doing what I do every year since retirement: sitting on me arse, drinking a jug of coffee, and reading musings of various authors! Have a wonderful St. Patrick’s day, y’all!

    Liked by 4 people

  2. I don’t do much of anything. I tried corned beef and cabbage one year and…bleah. The Hubby doesn’t drink much anymore. I did make Koda (my dog) wear a sparkly green bow-tied to our meet and greet last Saturday. 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Cheers to your health as well, Lisa! I come from a long line of proud Irish folk, so I’ll be lifting a glass of Tullamore Dew while the Corrs play in the background. May have to re-watch Derry Girls, too!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Sláinte! On the Big Day, I’ll be wearing my green Aran Island knitted hoody. It’s more of a hunter green, Kelly green doesn’t work for me. I’ve ordered all the black pudding and rashers a family could gorge on during a full Irish breakfast but we have postponed it until Easter because I went Outside (left Alaska) for Left Coast Crime exposing myself to who-knows-what and one of my grandkids is particularly fragile. He gets everything and when he gets it, he’s sicker than anyone. Meanwhile I’ve been torturing the grand who lives with me with Irish music during our now-canceled commute with particular focus on songs in the Irish language and uillean pipe music. Last night I made enough shepherd’s pie for two days. He ate half of it. He’s 15 years old. So tonight I’m making enough baked beans for two days. He’ll probably masscare that as well. Thank God, I bought two ten-pound bags of potatoes. I can always eat that. Tomorrow, if my favorite gluten free place is open, they’re making corned beef and cabbage.

    Liked by 3 people

  5. I am 41% Irish (though my brother is 68%–DNA is interesting) and will be enjoying the day wearing my green and some of the beautiful Irish jewelry my husband has given me over the years. As our usual tradition, I’ll play some Irish CDs and we’ll watch “The Quiet Man”.

    Liked by 3 people

  6. I signed up for a virtual 5K with a St. Patrick’s Day theme. The shirt and medal are green, and they say, “Kiss me, I’m a runner.” Hopefully, it will have stopped raining so I can go for a run after work (working from home). Otherwise, I’ll run on Wednesday.

    Liked by 4 people

    • A virtual 5K! What a great idea. We have something here called the Shamrock Shuffle. I meet up with the runners afterward at the finish line, aka The Wild Rover (here, it’s just called “the Ro-vah.”). Good luck, and be sure to post that medal on FB.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Slainte! I’m self-isolating, of course. Living alone, it’s really isolate! I do have beer in the fridge, though, so I’ll raise a glass and toast the Irish Saint. Thanks for a fun post! (Part Irish, in with a lot of other things.)

    Liked by 3 people

    • Yay! You’re festive. Have only made cabbage for St. Patrick’s once, and I doubled the recipe for some reason and it made like a trillion pounds and we had cabbage for days on end afterwards and have never done it since because I think we ate so much that our bodies are good for eons, cabbage-wise.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. What a fantastically funny post, Lisa! I literally laughed out loud at the attire-hunting–especially the Liz Lemon GIF. Ha!!!

    This year, we’re forgoing a St. Patrick’s Day party and staying home for our green beer. I’ll drink it no matter the shade!

    Thanks for your wonderful post. I’ll be chuckling all day.

    Erin go bragh!

    Liked by 2 people

  9. Kathy, you and Karen should be our Colleen Queens, because you are always smiling! I don’t have any Hulk Hands like Liz, But I do own that “everyone loves an Irish girl” T-shirt, courtesy of Tar-jay.

    Liked by 4 people

    • Fabulous! Most of my Paddy’s Day garb comes from Old Navy. Classics at five bucks a pop!

      And funny aside: a lot of people think I’m Irish because of “Kathleen” and my reddish hair. I’m named after an Irish chanteuse my dad carried a torch for, and I haven’t seen my real hair color in 30 years.

      Liked by 2 people

  10. Triple-shamrock-love–thank you so much for this delightful post!

    Adore all of the pictures with Lucy and Farley and you and the Captain. Thoroughly enjoyed reading this and it made me feel better about not wearing being able to wear green to work (I even bought a scarf this year ha!) or hoisting a green beer while out and about.

    Have a very happy celebration… will be toasting everybody here from afar. ☘️

    ps: That is my FAVORITE Tina Fey gif that I have used on St. Patrick’s…so if I use it tomorrow, I am not copying you, lol.

    Liked by 2 people

  11. Late to the party, as I just arrived in Honolulu from San Diego (waiting for my flight to Hilo). So glad the flight wasn’t cancelled!

    Love this post, Lisa and–like Kaye–think I’ll wait till tomorrow to share it. (I actually woke up this morning thinking it was already St. Paddy’s Day and worried that I didn’t have any green on for my airplane flight, lol.) I will celebrate tomorrow with a very green gin and lime juice!

    Liked by 1 person

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