Leslie Karst

Sisters

My sister’s here in Hilo for two weeks, on what has become her traditional yearly visit. Laura is five years younger than me, so when we were little kids, although we shared a bedroom, we didn’t hang out together that much. I mean, why would a mature (in her eyes, anyway) ten-year-old girl want to spend time with her dumb five-year-old sister?

an occasion when I enjoyed playing big sister to Laura

But then my family spent a year in Oxford, England, when I was sixteen and she was eleven. That changed everything. We were thrown together in a foreign culture, spending hours sitting next to each other in the back seat of the car while my dad drove us to visit every Roman ruin within a day’s drive of our temporary home.

And we bonded. Over making fun of Dad’s passion for the Fosse Way; over The Magic Roundabout, a silly kids show on British TV of that era, and a radio ad jingle for some dessert item whose name neither of us can remember, that played incessantly on the car radio in England in 1972. (We still sing that jingle together, by the way: “Looks like a waffle, tastes like a dream….”)

Oxford, winter 1972

And Laura and I remained best friends. So much so that we even formed a country rock band together back in the 1990s, performing songs that we called “New Western Wave,” with “Everly Sisters” inspired harmonies. (You can listen to the songs here, if you like.)

All these years later, we’re still close. So I treasure the time we get to spend together here in Hawai‘i each year. We visit the marvelous KTA grocery store and wander down the aisles, gazing at the myriad selections in the Asian food section and buying unknown ingredients to take home and try out for ourselves. We go swimming at “Four Mile,” where there’s a metal ladder into the ocean, just like in a swimming pool, and sea turtles mill about in the shallows hoping for a handout.

We hang out on Robin’s and my lānai, drinking morning coffee and reading the local paper and discussing local news stories about such exciting topics as the new dinosaur exhibit at the ’Imiloa Astronomy Center. And of course we go to Coconut Island for cocktail hour and toast our parents, whose ashes we spread at that very special place three years ago.

on our front lānai here in Hilo

So here’s to sisters (and brothers)! I’m so very lucky to have you in my life, Laura.

Readers: Are you close to your siblings? Or to other relatives?

24 thoughts on “Sisters”

  1. I was not that close with my siblings. My brothers were 18 and 20 when I was born. They were already out of the house and in the Air Force. My sister was home but she was 16. It was like having 2 moms. I was closer with my nieces and nephews who were more my age. It was like being an only child until I grew up and we became closer after I got married and had children of my own. My siblings have all passed on now, but thankfully, my niece and nephew are not far away and we stay in touch. You are so lucky to have your sister to share some special time with. Treasure every minute.

    Carol

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    1. I can imagine that an 18 and 20 year age difference would make it hard to bond with siblings–that’s pretty much a whole generation’s difference! Even a 5 year difference was tough when my sister and I were young. But I’m so glad you had–and have–your niece and nephew!
      And I do, indeed, treasure every minute with Laura.

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  2. Great post, Leslie! I love it when Laura chimes in here or on your FB feed–so easy to see what good friends you are. My big sis and I have a lot of years (and an entire US) between us, but we’re very close as well. I tried really hard to find that waffle-y jingle online, but no luck. I went straight down the rabbit hole on old UK food commercials, though. Marmite? Canned mushy peas (kids love them!)? Tinned fish? I had to stop.

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  3. What a beautiful post! You two have had some wonderful adventures together. I’m closer to one of my brothers than the other. I’m five years older than him too, so the friendship began more when we were on our twenties. Before that, I was the oldest and the only girl, so I wound up being more of a mom. I fit Eldest Daughter Syndrome to a tee.

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  4. I’m the 7th of 8 kids with an age span of 16 years. I never thought much about always being able to field a softball team or having so many hands readying a campsite or gathering for raucous dinner conversations. We’re all still close, with most of us here in CO (sibs in WY, VA, and OR). It’s hard to get together too often though, because not many places can hold us all!

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      1. When we’d get together with extended family, we needed nametags. I never knew if my dad was yanking my chain or not, but when my cousin Frankie and I would inevitably switch nametags, my dad didn’t know who I was.

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  7. Thank you for sharing this wonderful post, Leslie! I’m the youngest of eight. My oldest sister says she helped raise me when I was little. I’m happy to say that all of us are still here. I have one brother I haven’t spoken to in years, but get along quite well with the rest. Not too bad, all things considered, I think.

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  8. I was much older than my siblings – especially my sister (8 years) – that we weren’t close when I was young. Now that we’re all in our 40s and 50s (okay, that’s just me), we’re a lot closer. I spend a week with my sister every summer.

    Of course, there is the one brother who has chosen to distance himself from all of us, but hey, his problem not ours.

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  10. Leslie, my sister is five years younger than me and my brother is nine years younger than me. Growing up I would have gladly sold them both for a nickel! As adults, we’re all good friends. We text often and have vacationed together!

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  12. My sister is 4 years older than me and that seemed like an eternity growing up. She had nothing to do with me and accused me of interfering with her boyfriends. She also thought that our parents liked me more. But somewhere after college, we became closer. She got married and had two children whereas I did not do any of that. That somehow pulled us apart and she thought that I never did anything for them and was not a good aunt despite the fact that I made her pregnancy clothes and children’s clothes and went to see her many times (a 45-minute drive by that time). My niece and nephew never felt that way though (or so they tell me). I think that she was jealous of my relationship with my parents. She got married and moved away, I graduated college and went home to live and work for four years and became not just a daughter but a friend to my parents. So, we grew apart. Then after mother died, she unloaded on me all of her resentments and said that she felt better now and how about me? Then she did not talk to me for almost a year. Many years down the way, I said this is ridiculous and life is too short and now we are closer and have gotten together many times. I live in Georgia, and she lives in our home state of Texas. I feel like I am the big sister. I love her but also feel that my best friend is more of a sister to me than she was. But that is life.

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