It’s October, and instead of regaling you with another love letter to the Spooky Season (“We know, we know, you love Halloween!”) I’m going to make a confession.
I low-key suck at Halloween costumes.
Maybe if I had an awesome Halloween party to attend, I would up my game. Or maybe if I had kiddos to take trick-or-treating, I would try planning ahead. But I’m usually so busy figuring out what I want to do for my birthday the week before that I run out of steam to come up with a costume on the big day.
I did manage to pull off Mrs. Roper a couple of years ago because we had somewhere to be:
But I hate repeating costumes, so I’m always looking for inspiration.
Luckily, there’s a new trend going around on Threads that’s giving me some ideas.
It all started with a recurring joke that’s been making the rounds for several years: “I hate gay Halloween because what do you mean you’re going as [obscure pop culture reference].”
This year, we have our own spin-off: “I hate writer Halloween. What do you mean you’re going as [something only a writer could appreciate].”
I love an obscure in-joke, so these are costumes I could actually get behind! A sampling of some of my favorites:
“I hate writer Halloween. What do you mean you’re going as…”
… all the darlings you’ve killed?
… Book 3_Final7final_noreallyFINAL(1).doc?
… the typo that seven rounds of edits somehow missed?
… the deal announcement for a novel with an unnervingly similar premise to your WIP?
… a query tracker frowny face?
… a one-star Amazon review based solely on shipping time?
And perhaps the most devastating:
(To which someone else replied, “I James never do that!”)
Okay, now that I’ve gotten inspired, it’s time for me to go start planning my costume for “audiobook version I’ve never listened to because I’m afraid Kelsey won’t sound the same she does in my head.”
Readers, what obscure thing would you like to dress up as for Halloween? Or, if you’re more of a traditionalist, what’s your go-to costume? 
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
MARLA COOPER is the author of the Kelsey McKenna Destination Wedding Mysteries, a humorous cozy mystery series with a destination wedding planner turned amateur sleuth. She also just wrapped up a slightly unhinged cozy mystery short, “Welcome to Cozy Town,” which is available for free at www.marlacooper.com. Marla is currently living in Austin where she’s Vice President of the Heart of Texas chapter of Sisters in Crime.
Hmm, what a challenge.
“I hate writer Halloween. What do you mean you’re going as…
An Oxford comma?
A plot hole that didn’t get filled in?
Chekhov’s gun?
The cryptic middle of the night note?
Hestia, I knew you’d be up for this challenge! Are you a costume person? I could see you coming up with some elaborate Halloween costumes!
These are awesome, Hestia!
This was a tough one. LOL! “I hate reader Halloween. What do you mean you’re going as the series that ended with unanswered questions?”
Sorry, I didn’t mean to give you homework! But you nailed it! 😂
LOL! I didn’t consider it “homework.” LOL!
In 2024, I borrowed the gown from a friend who got her PhD at Oxford and wore it with jeans, Chucks, and pearls and went to a party as “Oxford Comma-la Harris.”
What?!?! That’s SO GOOD!!
My favorite couples costume was when I was a young First Lieutenant (a million years ago) and went to a party with an Army doctor. He wore camouflage pants and a T-shirt and I wore a camo overshirt and jeans and we called ourselves “Upper and Lower GI.”
And that’s all I got!
That’s hilarious! You’re good at this. Maybe you could be a Halloween costume consultant! 🙂
Haha! But really – that is ALL I’ve got!
Haha! What fun, Marla!
“I hate writer Halloween. What do you mean you’re going as one of your punny titles?”
Usually I change it up every year (unless I’m really lazy, and then I have go-to Halloween tees). I tie my costumes to events (this year, it’s bookish Belle–not fancy Belle–because I was already volunteering for a local festival) or family themes (one year, my kiddos dressed as Spy x Family characters, so I followed suit).
Ha!! Punny titles is the perfect cozy author costume! Also: We need pictures of Bookish Belle! (P.S. A Halloween tee is a great last-minute choice. As are Halloween pajamas if you’re staying in!)
I’m bad at costumes, too. It’s why I have been Mr. Incredible for how many million years. I’ve got the stuff on hand and don’t have to dry to come up with anything else.
But if I were going to be something obscure, I’d probably pick a reader’s TBR pile/mountain/mountain range. That’s scary, but in the best possible way.
Yes! The dreaded TBR list! That would actually make a pretty fun costume — although there’s something to be said for something you can pull out anytime you need it. (For me, that’s Mrs. Roper.)
Hilarious!
LOLOL! As a theatre nerd, I love the first “I hate Halloween” RENT reference!
I hate dressing up in costume and am not good at it. In college, I put on a blue leotard and told people I was a Brillo pad. Someone informed me they were pink, so I was actually an SOS pad.
I did do a writer costume once. By that, I mean I wore my regular clothes and a pin I made that said “Unemployed writer.”
Ha! I relate to this SO MUCH! 😂
Someday, I want to attach an important bit of information to a shirt and tell everyone I’m someone who got a clue. I dunno, it makes me laugh.
Hilarious!
Unlike jokes, costumes *are* funnier when you have to explain them! 😂
I’m not one much for costumes any more, but back in the day I was really into them. During law school I went as a yellow legal pad, and in college three friends and I went as a four-pack of Guinness. Tomorrow night a neighbor is having a cowboys and aliens Halloween party, and Robin is going as an alien, using my old-school metal colander as a head-piece. (I’m going as a boring cowboy because I happen to have a Western-style shirt and bandana here in Hilo).
That sounds like so much fun! I wish you were here, I have a ton of western wear I could load you up with. (Pictures after, please!)
Marla, this is so fun! And I love your Mrs. Roper costume! I once literally stumbled into a Mrs. Roper impersonator contest in Edmonds, WA. Mrs. Ropers were EVERYWHERE, and they were all amazing (some were way off, but that was part of the fun). I have been very uninspired re: costumes lately. We’re all supposed to wear silver to Crime Bake for the conference’s 25th, and…I got nuthin’. Writer’s costumes? Um…maybe we could all get together and go as Tropes Forbidden in Cozies. Dibs on the Love Triangle.