Much as I despise admitting it, words don’t always come to me as quickly as they once did. There’s nothing like having a word on the tip of your tongue, then have it dart away and zip around your brain like a fly trying to dodge a swatter. Recently I endured a particularly bad bout of what-is-that-damn-word-I-had-it-a-minute-ago-and-it-went-away-and-then-came-back-and-then-went-away-again-itis. The little devil of a word taunted me, hovering at the cusp of memory and then darting off again. I tried thesaurus.com to find words like it but none of them were right. I tried all manner of writer and mystery thesauruses, and nothing landed. In desperation, I finally tried this:
1. I made the face I felt expressed the #$!@* word I was looking for. I held the face and the feeling for a few minutes. The word grew closer… but wasn’t quite there.
2. I took pictures of my face expressing the feeling of the word, or at least what I could approximate, and studied the photos…
3. I closed my eyes, made the face, and felt the word again.
Finally, FINALLY, it came to me! The word I was looking for was “rueful.” Do you see it in these photos? Maybe a little? I know, it’s kind of nutty. Or… brilliant? As I was going through this I couldn’t decide if I was on to something or losing my mind. All I can say is the process of feeling the emotion of the word, creating a visual, and linking the two up got me out of my word-fly-swatting stasis.
It’s for sure a time-consuming process for one li’l ol’ word. Still, we all know that feeling when we want the exact right one and nothing else will do. So at least I have a fallback in the search for it.
Let’s just hope that after this laborious journey, I used the word correctly … she wrote ruefully.
Readers, have you created your own way of finding a word or an item or anything?
Chicks on the Case 
Oh, please my dearest El, that is how I live my life! If I want to tell someone something- I must write it down. IE: I know I’ll be talking to my daughter this evening. She has her own list of “stuff” on my desk that I need to ask her or tell her. It isn’t even that I haven’t spoken to her in a while, either. My desk is a list of notes. Best of luck trying to decide what paper belongs to what person! LOL! So you searching for that #$!@* (I had to look above for proper spelling) word already puts you miles ahead of me. You lost one word. I lose complete trains of thought! LOL! XO PS: I did see ‘rueful’ in those pics. I think you’re brilliantly losing your mind. If a mash-up of the choices is acceptable. 😉
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Tom, lol! I live by lists. The person who moved into my apartment bedroom after I graduated college told me she was still finding lists I left myself six months later!
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It’s Tracy, Hon. I could only wish to be Tom, so thanks. 😉 Poor Tom wouldn’t want this dull life, but he may like the amount of time I have for reading.
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Tracy, so sorry! I’m in NY at my mom’s and totally off my game. I knew it was Tracy and typed Tom. Talk about a brain fart. It’s like when I have an appointment at 5 and I know it’s 5 but I show up at 4 because my brain effed up. Do you know what i mean???
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I feel for you, Ellen. There are times I simply cannot find the word I’m looking for. In desperate times like that, I go to my thesaurus. Flipping through the pages is time consuming, but it usually gets the job done. Usually, that is.
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You can beat a thesaurus! Although there are times when my addled brain refuses the help.
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The Apple Thesaurus built into my apps gets me through most of those tough moments. However, if that elusive word still hovers beyond my reach, it reminds me of trying to retrieve a beach ball from the swimming pool with one hand — darn near impossible. Then, in a quiet moment, that word dances across the stage of my mind like the Rockets. Go figure!
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Isn’t that how it always goes?
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LoL, great story and another great tip. Yes, you definitely look rueful.
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I’m so glad you see it! Not the most flattering photos but it’s all for the cause.
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I LOVE your system! I will be having a conversation with hubby about something and get to a point that I want to make or a name I can’t think of. I stop and say, “That isn’t the right .” I can see it in my mind but it just won’t come. I can hear it in my head, but it is like conversation in a far away room. We finish what we were talking about, and go about the rest of the day, but that word I was trying to think of, or that name just won’t come to me. It drives me nuts. But then out of the blue, sometimes in the middle of the night much to hubby’s chagrin, I will blurt it out. It is such a good feeling when that word or name finally appears.
Carol
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Ah yes, the middle of the night blurt. I think we can all relate to that!
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When I’m drafting, I just use a placeholder if the word doesn’t come immediately. Like Carol, usually it hits out of the blue and if I’m lucky, I’m near pen and paper or my phone so I can text myself. But sometimes it still isn’t there. In that case, if a quick search of my well-worn thesaurus doesn’t pan out, I go to my search bar and just start typing the words I’m dancing around. Almost always a better one—if not the actual one—pops up and then my thesaurus can do the rest. But omg, what an ordeal it is sometimes to find an itty bitty word! So satisfying when you can find it, however.
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Search bar the word – I hadn’t thought of that. Thanks for the tip!
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I do the it-finally-came-to-me-so-I’ll-blurt-it-out thing quite often. The other night, I sat up in bed and shouted “Colin Ferrell!!!” to absolutely no one.
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Did he show up for a social visit after you called his name though?
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LOL, Kathy!!
Sent from my iPhone
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LOL, Kathy! When I’m talking to somebody and can’t remember stuff like that I always say, “I’ll call you at 2am when I think of it.”
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Ha, El, what an ordeal! I would never have considered taking pix of myself while in such desperate throes, but it’s a cool idea. I usually just type “XX” and highlight it in Track Changes–or, as Becky does, I google close words or phrases. It takes me so long to write anything, though, the words are usually magically cemented in my brain by the time I input them.
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Oooh, googling a phrase. Thanks Lisa, I hadn’t that of that!
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Great idea and pics, El! I definitely use the thesaurus (online or physical). I don’t make faces for words, but sometimes when I’m trying to write actions, I’ll mimic the movement to figure out the word.
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I’ve done that too, Jen. Sometimes you just gotta act it out.
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I don’t find words flying out of my mind, but complete thoughts seem to like to leave and random intervals. And it’s very frustrating. Plus, I’ve always come up with what I wanted to say later. It’s why I would have been horrible at debate in school. I know I disagree, but I can’t articulate why until much, much later.
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Oh, there’s nothing worse than coming up with the exact words after the fact!
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Boy, do I ever! And as I like to say, proper nouns are the first to go. Oy. But all words are now fair game for this old gal.
And speaking of games, I think that would be a fun one: Take a photo of yourself acting out an emotion, and then others have to guess what it is. Kind of like emotional charades….
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That’s a great game for a mystery convention, Leslie!
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You’re so right, El!
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When I am at a loss for words or I go to do something and then I can’t remember what I was going to do, I pass through a portal and then back again and it usually comes to me.
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Any tips on finding that portal, Madelein? 😉
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You just walk through a doorway and back through the same doorway. It can be any in your house, but I was told this a long time ago and for some reason, it has worked for me. It is like I lost my thought or word and when I walked away and then reentered the space I had been in before, I suddenly remember. Sounds kind of sci fi, right?
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Madeleine!! I thought you were joking. But this is SOOOO cool. I’m going to try it next time my brain freezes up.
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I’m so relieved I’m not the only who experiences the elusive word problem! If I can’t immediately find it by searching phrases in google or by using an online thesaurus, then I’ll leave a blank underlined and highlighted space in the document and come back to it later during the first rewrite and the word generally makes itself know… and then all I can think of is how I could have been so stupid to not have remembered the word the first time around.
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LOL, nice workaround. And I know that feeling!
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Ohmygosh, Kim! So true!
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I close my eyes and breathe slowly to cleanse my mind. Then the word either the word comes to me (ha!) or I doze off.
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Priscilla, lol! I like the dozing part a LOT.
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Oh, sweet, silly Ellen… of course I know exactly what you mean. I love life in post-it notes! How do you think I keep you Chicks straight? Y’all are color coded! 😘
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Ha! Great system, Tracy. xoxo
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BTW, It’s midnight and Vickie just told me I posted this under Cynthia’s name. That tells you a little something about how my last two days have gone.
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Lol, Ellen! For a moment I thought you’d forgotten your name. (Since another Chick’s name is in the byline.)
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What?! OMG. Ugh, today has been pretty much a nightmare. Plus, I’m at Mom’s and working off my laptop in less than ideal circumstances. Thanks, Vickie. I’ll fix it.
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No worries, El. I was just afraid I was confused again about the Chick’s schedule!
And your rueful pics are adorable!
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I think it’s BRILLIANT and I love the pics!
My secret is to ask someone who can basically read my mind what I’m trying to say. My son is usually tasked with this. It reminds me of my mom’s old grocery lists:
“Get those good cookies I always like.”
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How funny – and yes, you do look rueful, Ellen. I usually leave it alone and the word comes to me – quite often at 3am.
Names challenge me on this more than anything. Last June, I was at my college reunion and a friend and I were talking about a guy I knew from the men’s swim team. I knew his first name, Lance. I finally remembered his last name.
Three days ago. Yes, almost four months after the conversation.
Of course I texted my friend to tell him.
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Well done, Liz! I break into a sweat when someone greets me by name and I can’t remember theirs. I go through so many machinations to try and either remember or get the name from someone else!
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I used to have a friend in high school who would add into a conversation we were having with someone at a party, “Hi, Lisa hasn’t introduced us yet,” and then look at me, waiting.
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Lisa, you call that a FRIEND??!
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