I’m writing PLOTTED, book #2 of my new Sugar Mill Marketplace series. Right now, the Marketplace consists of a used bookstore, bakery, chocolate shop, photography studio, and a cheese shop.
My cheesemonger, Skyler (think Meg Ryan back in the day), is teaching a charcuterie board class after the Marketplace closes one Friday night, so I had to do some research about how to design cheese boards. It’s not complicated, but I wanted to make sure I hit the high points.
There are a zillion different kinds and sizes of charcuterie boards, mostly wooden, and they can have anything on them. Classic boards, though, are comprised of meats, cheeses, crackers, olives, nuts, fruits, and veggies. Maybe some sauces and spreads for dipping, maybe a bit of greenery, some cute little pickles. You arrange everything in an attractive style and voila … creative snacking.
My research, as usual, led me down some fun rabbit holes. There were thousands of photos of gorgeous, mouth-watering charcuterie boards, but also some unusual ones.
Pancake boards? Yes, please!
Easter candy boards? Count me in!
Football-themed boards with cheese arranged in the shape of a goalpost? Touchdown!
Holiday boards in the shape of Christmas trees or wreaths? Not even a Grinch could resist!
Charcuterie boards covered in round foods only? Boards themed by ethnic bites? Red food boards?
Check, check, check.
I began to wonder what else could be represented by a properly-arranged charcuterie board.
What about your fix-it bench? Wouldn’t it look much better with an artistic array of screws, nails, brads, toggles, and tools beautifully appointed on a polished mahogany board?
How ‘bout something to make housecleaning more lovely? Arrange a medley of crystal bowls filled with cleansers and caustic substances alongside scrubbers, rags, and brushes. Think how much more enjoyable your chores would be!
My granddaughters have a wide assortment of hair doodads. How much easier morning routines would be if they could be presented with an exquisite display for their selections.
All of those would, of course, be quite useful. But any charcuterie tray should show the personality of the designer. With that in mind, I accepted the challenge of creating my very first Writer’s Charcuterie Board.
What items would you include on your personal charcuterie board?
Chicks on the Case 
Excellent post here. Now you are talking my language!
What would be on my board?
French cheeses (no blue please!) and Pretentious meats
Candied nuts
Anything possible with a champagne flavor (jellies, candies, dips) and Strawberries
Tiffany blue colored bowls
Petit fours
A sprinkling of recipe cards.
A piece of sterling silver jewelry, hiding under something
Or, a holiday board with
6 flavors of cookies and a dip for the plain cookies
homemade candies
Fresh fruit coated with sanding sugars and a fabulous dip
Pinwheels with sweet instead of savory flavors
Popcorn
Hot chocolate mix with marshmallows and crushed peppermint
Edible flowers
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Ooooh, make double for me!
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LoL on the pretentious meats!
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What amazing boards!
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Love this, Hestia. And Pretentious Meats sounds like the name of a grunge rock band…
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LOL!
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Ha, Pretentious Meats!
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This is brilliant, Becky! My writing charcuterie board would include tea, with caffeine of course, granola bars, red pens, rum and/or Irish whiskey, almonds, a note pad, and a music player. And some inspirational words from the Chicks! Cheers!
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Awesome, JC! My editor’s board would have the red pen(s), though. I edit in pencil. Corrections seem more friendly that way. And you’re right about the inspirational words … so necessary!
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Irish whiskey please!
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What’s the saying … write drunk, edit sober? lol
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Aww, inspirational words from the Chicks…
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J. C., sounds delightful. Something to play music on is a great addition.
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What a fun idea. My writing board would include yellow highlighters, a small bowl of tortilla chips, a cup of coffee, a stack of different colored post-it notes, black Bic pens (lots!) my small Moleskine notebook full of the odd notes I take when I’m out and about, a photo of the location I’m writing about, and college ruled notebook paper, all served up on a 50-year-old clipboard that my Dad got when he was in the Army.
I might have to set this up to inspire me when I need motivation to write!
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I like the vintage clipboard idea! And, yes, I forgot my notes. Can’t write anything without those!
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Mary, my writer’s board would have much in common with yours — coffee, Post-it notes, yellow highlighters, and stacks of scribbled notes (some of mine on cocktail napkins)!
Becky, I love your board — libations, chocolates, and Chicks on the Case pins!!
Ladies, let’s add clippings of glowing reviews to the board. I find those so delicious!
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Good call, Vickie! We should always have our 5-star reviews at the ready!
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Great addition, Vickie! Glowing reviews make the perfect little garnish.
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Actually, my family is going to put together a charcuterie board soon! Thanks for sharing your writer’s board, Becky! For mine, I think I’d put pens, chocolates, tea, sturdy journals, a small plant, and…will a laptop fit?
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You could use the laptop as the board. Not very functional to type on, but a sturdy base for all your treats!
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I’d probably have to buy a new one at that rate! (My computer has actually been acting up lately, and it’s a pain…)
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All the more reason to use it for your charcuterie!
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Champagne, buttered popcorn, a thesaurus, napkins (to wipe off the butter), and my lists of seasonal ingredients for Santa Cruz.
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Ooh, what a wonderful board! Don’t leave us hanging–name some current seasonal ingredients!
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Here in Hawai’i, it’s papayas, ahi tuna, and coconuts! (Though those last two are in season all year round…)
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LOTS of napkins!
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Love this! There’s a supporting character in my new series who’s a “charcuterie artist,” so this is right up my alley. It’s so much fun to research these boards and dream of creating ones for my character. My board? Hmmm… I think I’d just copy the one See’s candy created last year to promote their holiday treats!
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I guess when I asked about personal boards I was thinking more along the lines of “what would represent YOU on a board,” but I can get behind a See’s Candy board! Yum.
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Oh, trust me. A See’s board TOTALLY represents me!
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LOL!
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A writer’s board is GENIUS.
I would like to create a movie-watching board with popcorn, soda, Junior Mints, and licorice (naturally). If I were going old school, I’d hop down to Blockbuster (we have the last one on the planet, dontcha know) and grab a video tape.
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I would totally join you for your movie night! btw, we’re watching “Blockbuster” on Netflix, a sitcom about the last Blockbuster. It’s set in a fictional place, or at least they don’t talk about where it is. It’s not the best show in the world, but it’s gentle, sweet, and funny. And I always think of you when I dial it up!
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Ohhhh…Do I feel dumb. I didn’t even know charcuterie boards were a thing, and my GenZ cousin created a beautiful one for Thanksgiving. (She even had that pictured rose-salami. I was the only one who took a petal, and I felt very guilty.) My writer’s board? Hmm. I guess I’d do an Irish-themed one, to match my current series project. I take my tea iced, which horrifies most Irish people, but I’ll throw in the Barry’s tea tin, some postcards, Andes mints (not Irish, but they’re green), my little pot of live shamrocks, a lucky Irish penny, a quote that says “shut the #$%^ up and write” and a medal for St. Jude (patron saint of hopeless causes).
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I’m sure the leprechauns approve!
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